Siblings Weekend

This past weekend my siblings and I rented a house in Branson, Missouri for a siblings weekend. This is our second gathering since Covid travel restrictions have lifted. While we were missing one sister, and a couple of the husbands, the rest of us had a lovely, relaxing (except for the long-distance drives for some of them) weekend.

Three of the siblings made the delicious evening meals and we had chicken picata, grilled hamburgers, and meatloaf. Everyone pitched in together to cook and clean up. But the best part for me was the homemade donuts my sister made–because I sort of begged her to make them. Don’t worry–we had some left to take home with us. We played games, laughed together, talked about old memories, and made new ones. We also did the obligatory silly sibling (and in-law) picture together, as well as a more serious one.

We did not go to any shows, eat meals in a restaurant, or any of the other touristy things I usually do when I am in Branson. We sat on the balcony overlooking Table Rock Lake, and talked and talked and talked. Usually when we get together it is for a special occasion or holiday and it is hard to visit with one another during those times. I know we all appreciated the relaxed pace of the weekend, although my brother was bummed when he could not find his college football games on tv.

One of the things I love about our time together is the fact that each of us has their own distinct personality. To say that we are all strong-willed, is somewhat of an understatement. But despite that, we seem to understand each other and allow for our differences. We all have our strengths and weaknesses and believe no one is aware of them like family! But despite that we seem to still love one another. We can certainly squabble like most siblings do, but beneath it all is an abiding love of family and a respect for who we are.

Photo by Debbie White

We were lucky to have parents who disciplined us, taught us the value of hard work, and most of all, loved us. The dynamics of our family changed after Dad, and then Mom, passed away. We all lead busy lives and are not together as much as we were in the past. We each have our own families that are integral parts of our lives. We are finding that unless we make a deliberate plan to be together, time slips by and suddenly we look up and it has been months since we have seen each other. Our sibling weekend is a commitment that we will always try to make a place in our lives for one another.

I realize that there are some of you out there that have families that are fractured and highly dysfunctional. And in all honesty, my heart aches for those individuals I know who are caught up in the drama that some families can bring. But for me, I realize that my family is where God placed me. They helped shape and mold me and I am grateful for that gift. So here is to many more sibling weekends together as long as God allows!

“You don’t choose your family. They are God’s gift to you, as you are to them.” –Desmond Tutu

Hidden Potential*

When they were first married, my son and his wife purchased a home that was a short sale. When they first brought me to see the house, it was somewhat difficult to look past the dirt and junk. There were piles of toys, clothes, and miscellaneous items that had been left by the previous owners.  In the bathroom, the tub surround was full of crayon scribbles and the toilets were in dire need of a good cleaning and disinfectant. In the basement the refrigerator still had food in it, and the smell was rank when the door was opened. Even trash had been left in the kitchen can.

The outside had ivy growing unchecked around the entire foundation. The large back yard was full of weeds and shrubs that had been allowed to grow wild, not to mention a pile of cinder blocks that served no useful function that we could see. Dead trees had fallen and the decaying logs were lying on the ground.

Most people would have walked away after seeing the first room, and indeed, at first I just saw all of the surface issues. But on a deeper, second look, I could envision the possibilities they saw in the home. As they worked hard at making the house into a home, a beautiful picture emerged.

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The Little Yellow House

One of my favorite aunts passed away yesterday (dare I say my favorite?). I only have two aunts left out of 14 originally. She was kind and compassionate, hospitable, and patient. She was generous with her love. And even though she had bright red hair, she did not have the temper that is such a stereotype for redheads! Although I do have to say I saw her aggravated occasionally, usually with my uncle. But it must not have been too bad because they were married over 65 years.

I have lots of fond memories of spending time at her little yellow house that was truly a home. I loved her green Fiesta Ware dishes that were square instead of round. I enjoyed eating her “cheesecake.” It was not until later that I learned it technically was pineapple fluff, not a true cheesecake. But it did have a graham cracker crust and cream cheese in it.

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Snow Days

Today I am looking out my window and watching the snow steadily fall with a quiet whisper. As it accumulates and covers everything with a blanket of white, in my mind I am revisiting my childhood. Days like today have a sweet poignancy for me. They remind me of days that are past, but memories that are priceless.

I can envision the snow drifts piled along the fences and covering some of the roads. There was no snowplow with its big scoop to shovel the snow on our quarter mile lane. If it was a weekday, we put on our snow boots and walked to the main road and waited until the school bus came. But when we had snow on a weekend–then the fun began. We lived in the country and watching tv on snowy days was not an option.

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Welcome Home

October  27 is a bittersweet day for me. It is a day that leaves me kind of weepy, sad, and nostalgic all at the same time. It is also a day that reminds me of the joy of having Christ as my Savior and the hope of heaven. Eight years ago today my husband of 28 years woke up in a glorious new place, and sometimes I envy him for getting to experience what I long for someday. Then five years later to the day, and almost to the same minute, my Mom silently drew her last breath and was welcomed into heaven.

Tom & LindaI miss them both, and selfishly, I would love to still have them here by my side. But the reality is that life goes on without them. I have had bad days and good days, but the good ones outnumber the bad ones. I have learned I am stronger than I ever thought I could be. I have grown a little wiser and I have learned some lessons about life.

Here are some of the lessons I learned: Continue reading

The Ants Go Marching

As an older woman whose children have all reached adulthood and live on their own, I am often reminded of how difficult it is being a Mom. As I read some of my younger friend’s Facebook posts, I wish I could make their journey easier, but in all honesty, even the best of parents experience their times of frustration and agony. I was far from a perfect Mom and there were days when I just wanted to throw in the towel or lock myself in the bathroom and throw a temper tantrum, kicking and screaming like a toddler (oh wait, I really did that!). Continue reading

A House Is Not a Home

I have old run down houseto say I love watching “Fixer Upper.”  It is absolutely one of my favorite shows.  Watching Chip and Joanna take an old, tired house and turn it into a thing of beauty is truly fun. I think one of the reasons I love the show so much is because growing up, we lived in some of those old, tired houses–only we never got to fix them up.  I wish I had pictures to share of some of the many places we lived. But alas, our house burned down when I was in college, and there are no childhood home pictures.  But I had two favorites. Continue reading